Bojonegoro

Last weekend was pretty amazing. There was a Baha’i conference at the Soraya home in Bojonegoro. Our young friend Hanafi left his motorbike at our house and we took the taxi for an hour to the bus station which is in an area with what I believe are salt-drying fields. We waited at the bus station for an hour before some friends arrived, then we got on the bus. After about 2 ½ hours we arrived and piled into beceks. We drove through the dark streets lit by star-shaped lanterns in the colors of the Indonesian flag. For once we weren’t the only foreign guests – a German woman pioneering in Sumatra was there, in addition to several of the Soraya relatives including the counselor, George, his wife, and their niece from Austria in addition to Dr. Jesbieh’s husband, Abbas, and several past and present members of the National Spiritual Assembly. That meant that Greg and I escaped the special treatment we received on our previous visits – I’d been waiting for this opportunity! I went to slept in a room with at least 30 other women of all ages. Everyone was so excited to see one another that the lights didn’t go off until at least midnight and the chattering continued for awhile after. All night long people continued to arrive. When I woke up, I thought I was in a sweat lodge – it was dark, I was drenched in sweat, I could feel bodies close all around me, there was loud chanting (the pre-dawn call to prayer from the neighboring mosque), and all around me in the dark, women were whispering their prayers. I couldn’t believe how early it was – there were still stars out! We made an early morning trip to the graves of the elder Mr. Soraya and a friend. It was my first time walking around the town, even though it was our third visit. It was beautiful! Nearly every street was lined with mango trees heavy with fruit. So different from Surabaya. Later, I took my first Indonesian bath (mandi). Washing my hair wasn’t quite as difficult as I’d thought it would be, though it seemed highly inefficient. Basically there’s a small room with a trough for water – you use a plastic dipper to scoop the water out, but you can’t actually touch the water in the trough. I later had the opportunity to learn that most people take full baths every time they enter a home – a family I visited later was very concerned when I emerged from the mandi with dry hair even though we were staying at their house for less than an hour.

In any case, we weren’t able to get much out of the conference since it was in Indonesian and took place sitting on a very hard floor in a very hot room. But we did have a great time talking (in English) with the other foreigners. It was really refreshing to have intellectual conversations – we don’t get much of that. It also made us realize that the problems we’ve been facing (a lack of communication about events taking place and the inability to obtain straightforward answers) are just general cultural issues that everyone has experienced. It also helped us to understand what our next step should be. All decisions within the Baha’i community and within the Baha’i administrative bodies, take place through a process called consultation which has very specific guidelines. For example, it is the obligation of each participant to provide their views frankly and courteously. This is always a difficult skill to learn – in all cultures – but it poses particular challenges in places like Indonesia where giving any indication of disagreement is unheard of, particularly since it’s such a hierarchichal society. No one will ever oppose the ‘leading’ individual, even though the Baha’i Faith never has ‘leaders’. It makes unification within a group very difficult, when an agreement must be reached, but no one is willing to offer their opinion on a solution to the problem at hand – or even willing to admit that a problem exists! We learned that this key process is actually the first priority of the Baha’i community we are in, and we are in a position to help! So that gives us an immediate goal that we hadn’t previously identified. It was excellent to share experiences with people who could relate to everything we have been experiencing as foreigners living in Surabaya and could even relate to our feelings about being expatriates with different goals than so many in our population. Now we finally know who to go to when we need help or advice. It’s a good feeling.

We left the conference full of wonderful, sweet mangos (totally unlike the fibrous ones in America), and crowded onto the bus. There were a ridiculous amount of people jammed in with us. Vendors and musicians still managed to get on and off at every stop. We bought a really good chewy coconut cake and some water. We got off and got on a succession of equally hot and crowded bemos finally arriving at the home of a family we are particularly close with in Surabaya (the parents of Ari and Hanafi). I had never been to their home, so it was neat to see. The parents both sell snacks at markets and their house was full of boxes of breads and treats. The woman served us cold sweet green drinks and longans (similar to lychees). We recovered for a few minutes, then left to go to a wedding reception – one of the Baha’i men in the community had a daughter who had just gotten married. A tent had been set up in the middle of the street with the traditional throne on a stage for the wedding couple. We sat on plastic stools and were served a very spicy soto (chicken soup with noodles), bananas, and cinnamon-scented fruit with ice in syrup (es buah). The bride came out and sat with us – next to me, actually. She had white tuber-rose blossoms sews into her hair like a net and hanging down her back. She looked beautiful and smelled wonderful. Her hair was pulled back under the flowers, but she had wisps of hair painted on her face. Her eyelids were covered in gold glitter, and the face make-up reminded me of a geisha with a pale base and very bright lipstick. She had a lace blouse over a kind of skirt. Unfortunately, I didn’t have my camera. We pretty much just ate and left, but in leaving we pressed money in envelopes into the hands of her parents. The mosquitos were terrible!

Next week Greg is taking the 10^th graders to Jogyakarta to see the temples, work on a Habitat for Humanity house, see the volcano damage, and so forth. It looks like I’ll be going to Bali to stay with an American family. I have a one-way ticket, so who knows what will happen…!